Times a Changin'

Wow how things can change ever so quickly. I am one for change I actually quite enjoy it, but I can only take so much at a time. I tend to think I can take more then most people however that is me gaging myself off of myself therefore having no validity. All of that to say there has been a lot of change recently.
Not just in my physical life but also in my emotional life.
My picture of God is growing and expanding in ways that are so beneficial for my spiritual health and soon my physical surroundings will be changing as well.

I am not sure if my affinity for change is a good thing or if it is a bad thing...I learned some time ago that I was addicted to change. I have to have some major change every 2 years or I think there is something wrong. It's rather strange that is so exact and most the time it has to do with a job or location change. As I have tried to analyze this personal trait I have come to the conclusion that I cause and create change in my own life for a sense of security. I know it sounds backwards but really it actually makes a lot of sense. I am looking for something I can try to control and if I can't control anything then why not move myself out of the uncontrollable environment into a different one because then at least I can try over again.

So now I am forced to look at the change that is taking place in my life right now and evaluate if this is another one of those moments.
In my time of reflection I have come to see that this change is a natural change and one that was going to take place with or with out me wanting. So I guess I am glad that I am on the upside of this change!

So what is the change you ask well here it is.
I moved to Hawaii and now I am moving back home!
Yep I am packing up and moving home. Why you ask?  Why am I leaving paradise? Of course it's for a guy but not the kinda of guy you are thinking of.
I have come to the conclusion that the guy whose lead I am following truly cares about my happiness and he wants what is best for me and what causes me to flourish.
God has really revealed that I am no longer safe or needed here. Not that I was ever needed but I was willing to be used and now that I have been used it's time for me to move on.

There have been plenty of reason to leave and even some to stay but after looking at a pro's and con's list I have come to the conclusion to just throw it out and do what seems illogical on most fronts. It even seems crazy to me but, I am not the one directing it. It's God he is showing me guiding me and helping me sift through what seems impossible to me.

There is a lot that could be said and a lot that could be done but I truly am content to leave it all where it is and move on. I have learned more then I thought I was going to coming into this situation. I have learned how to love deeper even when you are wronged, how to truly seek Gods guidance even when you so badly want to seek mans approval, I have learned that it truly doesn't matter what others think as long as I am seeking the heart of God. And I have truly started to understand how I can love myself.
It has been a really hard but amazing time.
And the biggest thing for me is that God is no longer the teacher but he's the lover of my soul. That has been detrimental to my think and understanding. He has truly open up the box that I have been putting him in and has allowed for me to see more of himself.

I was created to glorify him and when I do that he will be made known to all. It doesn't matter what I am doing or where I am doing it but all that matters and all that will ever matter is if I am glorifying him.

So now I am challenged and driven to glorify him in all that I am doing and I am not sure what that will look like and how it will all pan out but I will strive to do what needs to be done in order to make it happen where ever I end up being!


Here's to knew adventures and figuring out where I can better bring glory to his name!