Here's the video sorry about that :)
Finding Home
on a journey to know meaning, create stories, and to shine beauty, this is home
18.9.10
Arriving
I'm home, in Hawaii that is.
My first week here took some getting use to. Things here run at such a different pace then that of the OC life. It is wonderful and strange all at the same time. I truly feel mixed emotions about living on an island, slowing my life down. I am truly going to have to learn how to be still. I think this is something I have both been wanting and avoiding all at the same time.
I am truly grateful to have friends here I can call family otherwise I am not sure I could do it.
There are really great moments and then some really hard ones. It has been very difficult leaving behind my entire life to start a new one. I can't believe I am living so far away from everyone I love.
I have made some new friends and hope to continue doing so as I become more of a local.
It's not all that much different here then back home aside from the fact that the water is always warm and I can see the bottom o the ocean floor.
To be honest I haven't spent much time at the beach at all. I jumped right in when I got here on wed. night and started getting ready for sunday morning.
Sunday...Sunday...Sunday, well it was interesting. I lead worship for about 15 people. It's summer so a lot of them weren't there but, all and all it's not much bigger then that right now so I need to get use to it, for now. We are planning on growing the church and reaching out to the community but right now we are preparing the actual building before we do that.
It's really strange to think I am a music director at a church now...
I can honestly say I enjoy what I am doing even if it is so far away.
I hope you find great joy in what you do as you are doing it.
Things I could use pray for are:
- That my brother sells my car for more then the pay-off quote
- That I find an affordable place to live
- That I can find an affordable means of transportation
- That I develop great relationships with single people my age
- That I don't miss my family and friends too much
- And last but not least that I raise enough support to sustain myself in Hawaii (it's super expensive)
All that being said please let me know how I can be praying for you and how things are going.
I will post some pictures soon for now here is a little video you may have seen on Facebook already.
Much Love,
Kelly
9.9.10
6.5.10
try harder
FAILURE...
what comes to mind when you see this word?
disappointment
anger
hurt
pain
disbelief
shattered expectations
broken trust
loss of love
loss of community
loss of family/friends
a lot of things can spring from failure. it is very interesting how our human nature can turn something so natural and expected into something so forbidden. we are not perfect in any way so we are created to fail. i know that may seem harsh but it is the truth. if we never did we would never realize our human selves. we would actually have a valid reason for thinking we are gods.
however we fail, we fail on a daily basis and some of us on an hourly basis. (said with hand raised)
so today I experienced this in more ways then one;
way #1 I could not seem to find a document I typed up that took me close to 6 hrs to attain and write all the information for. I know crazy right. I worked on it and knew that I saved it however it is no where on the computer even the IT guts can't find it. (I obviously didn't save it) FAIL
way #2 I changed the voicemail on a students iphone and forgot to tell her...oops it was suppose to be funny however her parents and friends found it offensive. Which in turn got me a phone call and a scolding, which was deserved. (keep in mind it was not as bad as it may seem, but it hurt the student and her parents view me differently now) EPIC FAIL
way #3 I have been trying to commit to a work out routine...hahaha, that's been working, right.
I will work out for about 2 days and then I am over it for about a week then I'll try again and we start the cycle all over again.
way #4 I have a bunny! I don't want the bunny and I can't find her a home. why did I get a bunny if I don't want to take care of it? what was I thinking?
we are faced with failure on a daily basis whether it is something we have failed at or something that we see others fail at.
we need to look at our failures differently then how we have been taught by society.
a failure is not a chance for us to kick ourselves and tear each other a part.
It is a chance for us to truly see the hand of God. a chance where we can show how we really are. we are not defined by our failures but rather by how we respond to them. (I am sure someone has said that somewhere along the lines and it is nothing new but it is so true)
if we fail we see how God still uses us despite our short comings.
when someone else fails we have the opportunity to build them up, extend grace, and help them learn.
we really need to learn how to let go of our failures and move forward with our heads held high, knowing that we are here to truly experience all that we are. even if that includes all of our failures and short comings!!!
they don't define us they just add more beauty to our stories of meaning!
REALLY THINK ABOUT THIS ONE!!!
what comes to mind when you see this word?
disappointment
anger
hurt
pain
disbelief
shattered expectations
broken trust
loss of love
loss of community
loss of family/friends
a lot of things can spring from failure. it is very interesting how our human nature can turn something so natural and expected into something so forbidden. we are not perfect in any way so we are created to fail. i know that may seem harsh but it is the truth. if we never did we would never realize our human selves. we would actually have a valid reason for thinking we are gods.
however we fail, we fail on a daily basis and some of us on an hourly basis. (said with hand raised)
so today I experienced this in more ways then one;
way #1 I could not seem to find a document I typed up that took me close to 6 hrs to attain and write all the information for. I know crazy right. I worked on it and knew that I saved it however it is no where on the computer even the IT guts can't find it. (I obviously didn't save it) FAIL
way #2 I changed the voicemail on a students iphone and forgot to tell her...oops it was suppose to be funny however her parents and friends found it offensive. Which in turn got me a phone call and a scolding, which was deserved. (keep in mind it was not as bad as it may seem, but it hurt the student and her parents view me differently now) EPIC FAIL
way #3 I have been trying to commit to a work out routine...hahaha, that's been working, right.
I will work out for about 2 days and then I am over it for about a week then I'll try again and we start the cycle all over again.
way #4 I have a bunny! I don't want the bunny and I can't find her a home. why did I get a bunny if I don't want to take care of it? what was I thinking?
we are faced with failure on a daily basis whether it is something we have failed at or something that we see others fail at.
we need to look at our failures differently then how we have been taught by society.
a failure is not a chance for us to kick ourselves and tear each other a part.
It is a chance for us to truly see the hand of God. a chance where we can show how we really are. we are not defined by our failures but rather by how we respond to them. (I am sure someone has said that somewhere along the lines and it is nothing new but it is so true)
if we fail we see how God still uses us despite our short comings.
when someone else fails we have the opportunity to build them up, extend grace, and help them learn.
we really need to learn how to let go of our failures and move forward with our heads held high, knowing that we are here to truly experience all that we are. even if that includes all of our failures and short comings!!!
they don't define us they just add more beauty to our stories of meaning!
REALLY THINK ABOUT THIS ONE!!!
4.5.10
Life
Life is a funny thing.
We think it last a long time but, really in the scheme of things it is only but a breif reflection in a mirror.
I just found out 5 minutes ago that a co-worker and friend passed away at 1pm today.
At this moment I can't help but look back and reflect on my life and who I am as I look at his life and the way he lived his. He was a man who knew is meaning and purpose in life. He was focused and passionate about where he was and what he was doing. If I can live my life that way I will have lived a great significant menaingful life.
I truly believe that we each have a chance to make a difference in the world. I do think we were created to change things. I am not sure on what scale but, I am sure that we are made to make a difference. And each one of us has an area of influence in whcih we can make an impact.
Think with me for a minute...
What do you love to do?
Something that you live for and would feel incomplete with out doing.
Are you doing that?
To what degree are you allowing that incompase your life?
How could you go out and take that passion to the world?
How are you making a difference right now with where you are at in your life?
I think we need to continually be asking ourselves theses questions so we are remind of what it is we are doing and why we are doing it.
I truly hope that you are living out your passion in a way that is changing the world and making a difference. You have the tools and abilities to impact those around you so if you aren't get up and do it.
Do it for those who have gone before you, for those who gave you an example.
They did not live out their passion only to watch you become apathetic and disheartened. They lived out their passions to inspire you to do the same!
We think it last a long time but, really in the scheme of things it is only but a breif reflection in a mirror.
I just found out 5 minutes ago that a co-worker and friend passed away at 1pm today.
At this moment I can't help but look back and reflect on my life and who I am as I look at his life and the way he lived his. He was a man who knew is meaning and purpose in life. He was focused and passionate about where he was and what he was doing. If I can live my life that way I will have lived a great significant menaingful life.
I truly believe that we each have a chance to make a difference in the world. I do think we were created to change things. I am not sure on what scale but, I am sure that we are made to make a difference. And each one of us has an area of influence in whcih we can make an impact.
Think with me for a minute...
What do you love to do?
Something that you live for and would feel incomplete with out doing.
Are you doing that?
To what degree are you allowing that incompase your life?
How could you go out and take that passion to the world?
How are you making a difference right now with where you are at in your life?
I think we need to continually be asking ourselves theses questions so we are remind of what it is we are doing and why we are doing it.
I truly hope that you are living out your passion in a way that is changing the world and making a difference. You have the tools and abilities to impact those around you so if you aren't get up and do it.
Do it for those who have gone before you, for those who gave you an example.
They did not live out their passion only to watch you become apathetic and disheartened. They lived out their passions to inspire you to do the same!
ARE YOU LIVING OUT YOUR PASSION?
find meaning, tell stories, create beauty!!!
29.4.10
Welcome Home
Have you ever felt that feeling of doubt or uncertainty welling up inside of you to the point of consumption?
I have for the past 2 years.
“I can’t hold it back any more, I am going to let it in and allow for it to take over for a moment and see where it takes me.” That was my response to these feelings a few weeks ago and I don’t think I could ever clearly explain how it has changed me but it truly has had one of the biggest impacts on who I am that I have ever experienced in my 28 years of life.
I have always questioned where home was and if I would ever find it. Hearing those around me say “home is where the heart is” “I am finally home” “it's always great to go home” never resounded with me. Don’t get me wrong I longed for it to but, there was a piece of me missing, or so that is what I thought.
I think I have come to find out that it was something entirely different. I needed to understand my meaning or my purpose in this life and then I would feel at home.
Recently I heard Irwin McManus say something that truly moved me and helped me finalize all that was going on inside of me for the past two years. He said “bring meaning, tell stories, and create beauty” that hit as though I had never been touched before. I know it seems so simple yet there is such a deep and profound truth to it, I can’t help but strive to live out my meaning and seek to be all that I was created to be.
Embracing all I was made for is going to be an incredible journey. But I stand confident knowing that part of who I am and who I will always be is a justice fighter. I will strive to be the voice of those unheard and the hands for those who can’t fight. I will stand in the gap and strive to make a better place for those who have no voice.
I know that this is part of my meaning/purpose in life and I will not lose sight of it because it makes me feel at home in my heart.
Knowing your meaning allows you a source of freedom that can not be replaced by any relationship, position, possession, or form of status. It gives you the ability to stand confident and know who you are and who you are not.
There is something to say about a person who truly owns their meaning allowing them to have stories so they can share them with others. When people hear stories it provokes a response whether the response be good or bad form the story tellers perspective or not it warrants a response.
I think we need to strive to see and seek out the stories in our lives more often and allow others the privilege of hearing them.
So I have created this blog. I hope you are drawn into engage with what I share about life and I hope it cases you to dream bigger, move with purpose, and love deeper.
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